I may not be playing either fest, but CAUSTIC WILL REPRAZENT REGARDLESS!!!

The shirts will be BLACK UNISEX T-SHIRTS with HOT PINK type (oh yeahhhhh…)

ONLY PREORDERS ARE GUARANTEED SIZES, so basically this is a normal order. I’m only ordering a few extras of these, so order now to ensure you get one. I most likely won’t make these designs again.

Thanks.

KINETIK VERSION (Mailing late March)

In the U.S. KINETIK (postage included)

Sm $24.00 USD Med $24.00 USD Lg $24.00 USD XL $24.00 USD 2XL $26.00 USD 3XL $27.00 USD

CANADA KINETIK (postage included)

Sm $26.00 USD Med $26.00 USD Lg $26.00 USD XL $26.00 USD 2XL $28.00 USD 3XL $29.00 USD

UK/EURO KINETIK (postage included)

Sm $29.00 USD Med $29.00 USD Lg $29.00 USD XL $29.00 USD 2XL $30.00 USD 3XL $30.00 USD

********************************************

RESISTANZ VERSION, which doesn’t say Kinetik on it:)
(Mailed mid-late MARCH, in time for the fest)

U.S. RESISTANZ (postage included)

Sm $24.00 USD Med $24.00 USD Lg $24.00 USD XL $24.00 USD 2XL $25.00 USD 3XL $26.00 USD

CANADA RESISTANZ (postage included)

Sm $26.00 USD Med $26.00 USD Lg $26.00 USD XL $26.00 USD 2XL $27.00 USD 3XL $28.00 USD

UK/EURO RESISTANZ (postage included)

Sm $29.00 USD Med $29.00 USD Lg $29.00 USD XL $29.00 USD 2XL $30.00 USD 3XL $30.00 USD

Well the year isn’t over yet…

As a thanks to everyone who has been supporting and grabbing all of my releases this year I wanted to show my gratitude by giving you this: JUSTIN BIEBER’S NEVER SAY NEVER, an 11 track album featuring remixes from FGFC820, Ambassador21, Cryogen Second, Surgyn, Null Device, and more. It also features a NEW track and the cover of Cubanate’s classic Oxyacetylene I did with Be My Enemy, with assistance from the lovable Keef Baker!

Right click and save:
CAUSTIC- JUSTIN BIEBER’S NEVER SAY NEVER

TRACKLIST
Caustic
Justin Bieber’s Never Say Never
1- P5y8-® ©®07©h (Wet on the Dancefloor)
2- Generate Chaos (Cryogen Second Mix)
3- Floor Whore Disko (FGFC820 Mix)
4- Chum the Waters (Sinsect Mix)
5- Floor Whore Disko (Microwaved Mix)
6- Emmanuel Lewis Handjob (Null Device Mix)
7- Chum the Waters (Terror Firma Sky Mix)
8- White Knuckle Head Fuck (Ambassador21 Mix)
9- Floor Whore Disko (Surgyn Mix)
10- Orchid (For All The Emptiness Mix)
11- Oxyacetylene (Be My Enemy vs Caustic)

We promise to confuse everyone appropriately.

Get tickets HERE!

INFECTED MUSHROOM
MAJESTIC THEATER
MADISON, WI
Wed, November 30
Special Guests:
Jack Mulqueen
Caustic
Doors at 8
Show at 9
Tickets
$25 / $45 Opera Box

I won’t email you twice a day or anything, as that’s annoying as hell. I’ll just shoot you a emails with show updates, release info, and cool new merchandise.

Thanks!

For those who want Caustic soap [INSERT FIGHT CLUB JOKE HERE] that won’t scorch your skin off, head to SPOOKY GRRRL BATH AND BODY and get your bacon scented Caustic bar, Magical Unicorn Body Butter, and Lady Business heart-shaped bars! All hand made, vegan, and high quality!

And yes, vegan bacon-scented soap rules. Suck it.

ALSO, on November 22nd the WHITE KNUCKLE HEAD FUCK digital single is coming out! WKHF has been a huge club hit this year so we’re rolling out some top-notch remixes for it to keep you sexy bastards moving on the floor.

Here’s the tracklist!

1 White Knuckle Head Fuck (Caustic Hybrid Version V1.1)
2 White Knuckle Head Fuck (Aesthetic Perfection Mix)
3 White Knuckle Head Fuck (Fabrikc Mix)
4 Hiroshima Burn (iVardensphere Mix)
5 White Knuckle Head Fuck (Klutae Mix)
6 White Knuckle Head Fuck (Boole Mix)
7 Oontz oontz oontz blarrrrrrrgh (Vomiting at 3am Mix)(Dedicated to Lexis)

Available at Metropolis Records in the U.S. and on all major digital distros worldwide!

Here’s the Aesthetic Perfection mix from the album, just for a taste of the awesome.

Thanks!

This episode is 2009′s THIS IS JIZZCORE commentary track. For those who haven’t listened to any of the commentary tracks they’re just like DVD commentary tracks, just more obnoxious and, until Trail of Vomit’s, much, much drunker.

Enjoy. Members of The Gothsicles, Null Device, The Dark Clan, Stochastic Theory, and even my wife were in on this one, so get ready for stupid, people.

If you have an iPhone, iTouch or iPad and want to have endless mild amusement, then check out the new Caustic iPhone app now!

(iPhone/iTouch 4 owners– if you’re interested in this please WAIT a bit to purchase it, as the app is glitching with that series. Thanks for your patience. It’s working fine for everyone else.)

What do you get?

-Majickal Hateball– Caustic will answer your questions. 200+ predictions.
-stream all of Caustic’s music!
-Caustic twitter feed
-remix Cock Blockin’ Beats

Get it at the iTunes App Store, and spread the word!

Thanks.

-Matt
Caustic

Want cheaper vagina? GET IT NOW! Caustic’s THE GOLDEN VAGINA OF FAME AND PROFIT is now 10,00 EUR and 2,00 for postage!

Offer good until AUGUST 15th, 2011!

(Okay, it’s just coincidental it’s coming out now. The U.S. and U.K. still hate each other.)

This track was originally performed at Sheffield’s RESISTANZ FESTIVAL in April, with Cubanate/Be My Enemy‘s PHIL BARRY surprising the crowd and performing with Caustic. Needless to say the response was huge so we put together an “official” version of the cover as a FREE DOWNLOAD for everyone, with Caustic’s live bassist at that gig Keef Baker contributing his parts as well!

Listen here:
Be My Enemy vs Caustic Oxyacetylene by Caustic

DOWNLOAD IT HERE!

(and tell your friends!)

Buy the new Caustic via Metropolis in the U.S. HERE

Listen to some of the album HERE

Here’s the tracklist:
1 666 on the Crucifix
2 666 on the Crucifix (Be My Enemy Mix)
3 666 on the Crucifix (Bad Guy Mix by Uberbyte)
4 I Play Computer! (Workman’s Comp Mix by The Gothsicles)
5 666 on the Crucifix (666 On My Deadline Mix by Torrent Vaccine)
6 Chum the Waters (Null Device Mix)
7 Lady Business (Blank Mix)
8 The Completely Unwarranted and Unnecessary Return of Funkbot [UNRELEASED]

The Golden Vagina of Fame and Profit is out April 12th, so preorder now!

Golden Vagina mini-mix by Caustic

PREORDER at METROPOLIS RECORDS (U.S.)
and L-TRACKS (EUROPE incl. UK ONLY)

OUT APRIL 12th WORLDWIDE!

Get THE GOLDEN VAGINA OF FAME AND PROFIT on CD (out April 12th worldwide) for only EUR 14,00, including postage!

(PLEASE NOTE THE SPECIAL PREORDER OFFER EXPIRED MARCH 12th. Sorry.)

**PLEASE MAKE SURE YOUR ADDRESS IS CORRECT AS WELL**

Spread the word, and thanks!

Preorder in all other territories at Metropolis Records!

Hearts,
Matt
Caustic

The first episode is the COMMENTARY for …AND YOU WILL KNOW ME BY THE TRAIL OF VOMIT.

The second episode is a bunch of music and shit I like right now, including a track off the upcoming CD!

Subscribe/listen here:

Detox on ITUNES
Detox on PODMATIC

The last few months at Caustic HQ (aka “my house”) have been pretty amazing. I finally got the news that the new CD THE GOLDEN VAGINA OF FAME AND PROFIT was picked up by the legendary U.S. label METROPOLIS RECORDS (home of everyone from Assemblage 23 to KMFDM to Combichrist and Meat Beat Manifesto, amongst tons of others) AND I can finally announce that Caustic will ALSO be released in EUROPE by L-TRACKS MUSIC (most known as home of FADERHEAD).

This is bittersweet of course, as that means I will no longer be releasing Caustic on CRUNCH POD. Ben Arp has known about this possible transition since the first minute and has been nothing but understanding and supportive, but I’d like to take a second and thank Ben and the Crunch Pod family (and we are a family– a really dysfunctional one, but that’s why we party so well together) for all the help and dedication that Crunch Pod has given Caustic. I say in no way lightly that without Ben and Crunch Pod Caustic wouldn’t have had anywhere near the opportunities it has received.

THE GOLDEN VAGINA OF FAME AND PROFIT, out SPRING 2011.

Stay tuned, and thanks.

-Matt
Caustic,
selling out just like Babyland, Snog, and Mindless Self Indulgence did. Oh sweet, sweet compromise!

I can’t express how nice it is to know there’s a 100+ of you that were willing to support this. Lots of big announcements coming in the next month or so hopefully, so stay tuned and thanks again!

Thanks to DJ TekSlave and the Noisescape crew!

In the spirit of the holidays (namely greed– fuck I love money.), I’m putting up some discounted “fun packs” for anyone interested. For Packs ONE and TWO you can just PAYPAL the money to causticmerch@NOSPAMgmail.com (take out the “NOSPAM,” thx), but for Pack THREE please check with me for available styles and sizes.

PRICES INCLUDE U.S. POSTAGE. MESSAGE ME FOR NON-U.S. SHIPPING, as I don’t want to overcharge anyone and will check on it. I’ll sign anything you want, as well. Just let me know.

All Fun Pack orders will ALSO receive some CHEAPER THAN AN ABORTION condoms! Please do NOT use them though, people. They’re funny, but they’re older and I don’t want anyone with Caustic babies because you were drunk and forgot to pick up some Trojans.

EXTRAS! (and remind me what they are in the notes, please:))

-If anyone wants EXTRA shot glasses for stocking stuffers they’ll be $3.50 each.

-If anyone wants a copy of BOOZE UP AND RIOT included add $7. For THIS IS JIZZCORE 2CD add $10.

-If anyone wants a Caustic TELL ME ABOUT MY UTERUS thong add $6 (sizes “1″ and “2″ only)

Thanks!

PACK ONE – $23 (a 30% savings!)
Caustic “man on fire” winter beanie (black)
2 DESIGNATED DRINKER shot glasses
HITLER RUINED THAT MOUSTACHE FOR EVERYONE bumper sticker
…TRAIL OF VOMIT cd

PACK TWO- $30 (a 35% savings!)
Caustic “man on fire” winter beanie (black)
4 DESIGNATED DRINKER shot glasses
HITLER RUINED THAT MOUSTACHE FOR EVERYONE bumper sticker
…TRAIL OF VOMIT cd
Embroidered Caustic logo patch

PACK THREE- $40 (a 35% savings!)
Caustic T-shirt*
Caustic “man on fire” winter beanie (black)
4 DESIGNATED DRINKER shot glasses
HITLER RUINED THAT MOUSTACHE FOR EVERYONE bumper sticker
…TRAIL OF VOMIT cd
Embroidered Caustic logo patch

*styles/sizes may vary.

(offer good until Dec 20,2010)

2) Tip the bartender, especially when you’re getting free booze. If anything it makes them get to you faster at a crowded bar. Mostly it’s just polite and shows you’re appreciative.

3) Burn CD samplers of mp3s to give to people who haven’t heard you before is cheap and easy promotion. It’s mp3s, so packaging isn’t as much of an issue and it’s a nice surprise for a potential new fan and shows you’re not all about their money…even if you are, you greedy bastard.

4) A guest list shouldn’t be for people who are cheap and just looking to be “in” with you. It’s for either special guests (MOM! BIGTIME LABEL EXEC! ANGELINA JOLIE’S VAGINA!), a pitylisting (unemployed pals need a nice night out, too), or fellow artist (especially one who has guest listed you). Every guest listed costs the promoter money. That could affect YOUR money.

5) Play on multi-genre bills if possible. Play with punk and metal and folk bands with a similar vibe. Why? There’s a limited pool of fans for “what we do”. Multi-gerne shows open people’s eyes to just how cool your music is so you’re not just “some EBM band…and what the hell is ‘EBM’ anyway?” Be an ambassador, but make sure not to suck and ruin it for the rest of us;)

6) Don’t shit-talk any of the other bands from the stage unless they’re a) Friends, and b) In on the joke. Trashing other artists, especially openers who maybe aren’t as good live yet just makes you look petty and mostly like a dick. Giving them props is immesurably better, especially if not as many people saw their set(s).

7) Take a few minutes before you get on stage to relax and focus. You want to start the show with energy so even just jumping around and doing a few simple vocal exercises helps you hit the ground running.

Sunglasses. Don’t wear them on stage unless you’re a huge star (note: you’re not if you’re reading this). They either make you look like you’re hiding something or scared to look in people’s eyes. You’re missing a connection with the crowd if they can’t see your eyes. You don’t look mysterious or cool. Believe me on that.

9) If you’re not using every piece of gear, don’t bring it on stage. Sure, you think it makes you look more impressive, but all it’s doing is slowing down your breakdown for the next band and makes anyone who knows what that gear does say “Why the hell did they even bother bringing that?”

10) On that note: Zip ties and duct tape are your friends– especially if there are a lot of bands playing on the same bill. Fastening your equipment so you can unplug and get off the stage in a few minutes makes you look professional, fast, and worth booking again. (I learned this from TERRORFAKT, btw.)

AND a very important BONUS TIP:

11) Do the same fucking show for 5 people that you’d do for 500. It’s not the audience’s fault there aren’t more people there, and if it’s a good show they’ll ideally tell 50 pals each and you’ll sell the place out the next time you play. Be grateful for what you get– they could be home watching Dirty Jobs reruns or playing Call of Duty.